Broken Hearted Runner

Here's the thing about choices - Each decision is really a matter of weighing priorities and selecting something to let go. Because it wouldn't be a difficult choice if I didn't have to make a sacrifice, right? I wouldn't be spending all of this time contemplating my options if I could have it all, would I? No, making these kinds of life decisions all comes down to, what is the right thing to do? Not just for me, but for everyone involved. I can only have one of the two, not both... so which am I willing to sacrifice? And which path ultimately leads to the desired destination?  The truth is, given my current options, I think I could reach the goal either way.  If I stay on my current path, I have to climb over many hurdles carrying this heavy pack. There are trees in my way, a couple of muddy trenches to traverse, I'll get lost (like I already have so many times), and it will take all of my strength, while still having to depend on others to get me over the...

I've never actually read one of those "Choose Your Own Adventure" books from my childhood, but as I sit here contemplating my future options, based on my past decisions, I wonder about them and I wish I had. I wonder... how many endings are there? Does it really only come down to two endings, and all of the choices lead to one of those endings? If so, does it really matter what decisions I make throughout the entirety of the book? In reality, how equivalent are these books to real life? Do my day-to-day life decisions really matter if the outcome of those decisions are the same? Do I really only have two fates ahead of me? If so, how do I make those everyday decisions matter? I mean, if God gave me free will, and I only have one of two outcomes (heaven or hell), how does each decision get me closer and closer to the outcome I want? As is the norm over the past 6 months, once again, I find myself at a crossroads. It feels like my life is nothing BUT crossroads. E...

Vulnerability - adjective 1. capable of or susceptible to being wounded or hurt, as by a weapon 2. open to moral attack, criticism, temptation, etc. 3. (of a place) open to assault; difficult to defend Wow! That sounds about right. I've mentioned in previous blogs that my intentions with these writings are to put my sh!t out there; to let it all be known; and to be held accountable for it. If that's not vulnerability, then I don't know what it is. So, I'd like to take this opportunity to explain why I'm grateful for my vulnerability, what it has taught me, and why I recommend it to everyone who is reading. Capable of being wounded Ha! More like - I'm going to be punched in the gut, daily, by life, love, and the people I always trusted. And because I'm a secret masochist, I'm going to welcome it... and give them more ammunition which leads to being... Open to moral attack, criticism, temptation, etc. Yep. I am working at being more "vir...